The Sports Porch Black and Gold - Paul Skenes the All Star

Chris: Welcome to the sports sports black and gold edition here in Pittsburgh on this super gross, super hot night. We're not on the porch because the branch swap. He was afraid that he would melt.

Marc: It has nothing to do with me.

Marc: It has everything to do with you. Well, I was front running you. I knew you would complain. see what I have to deal with people. That's exactly right. So the Sports Porch Black and Gold, the podcast, you can catch it right after the show on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or anywhere you get your frigging podcasts. We do drop it right after the show. And of course, you can follow the Sports Porch Black and Gold on YouTube. YouTube. We are at the Sports Porch podcast. And what do we do here? Well, we talk about a lot of things, a lot of Pittsburgh things, mostly Pittsburgh sports. Of course, we're going to have bucko talk tonight because we have to have bucko talk. We're going to talk, there's nothing going on with the Steelers right now that's worth talking about. Camp's starting what, next week?

Steve: Oh, they got a few more weeks until camp.

Marc: We do have a suspension to talk about.

SPEAKER_04: Yeah, we can talk about camp.

Chris: We're going to also talk Hockey Jesus is going to dispel some rumors about a top-notch Penguins player. So stay tuned. We do have snack time with Trader Joe's, of course, and what we are watching and all of the ridiculousness in between that it comes with. We got a lot of that. Yes, welcome. If you're watching us live right now, you're watching us on Facebook, on LinkedIn, on YouTube, on X, and the Instagram crowd is in the house. Want to thank Fantasy Alpha for being here as well. And I did forget the Grand Schwabini will have a prediction. Oh yeah, it's a good one. You're going to want to hear this one. You're going to want to hear it, folks. Yeah, so let's let's talk real quick about the subject du jour, because in the dead zone, as we like to call it, in between hockey, football and anything else relevant, we have Pirates baseball. And so congratulations are in order to Paul Skeens and Brian Reynolds, who have been named to the All-Star team. The Buccos, however, are Thank you for the golf clap. I'm sure they appreciate that. The Buccos are, however, treading water. They lost the series to St. Louis. They just split with the Mets. They exploded for 14 runs on Friday night. How much fun was that?

Marc: They hit seven home runs in that game?

Chris: Yeah, but Reynolds had two and a Grand Slam, and Ratty had two with the Grand Slam.

Marc: You know what is terrible? Please don't get angry at me for saying this. I almost texted you guys. I happened to be looking the moment when Reynolds hit the Grand Slam, and I almost texted out, you should trade him now. His value will never be higher.

Chris: Yeah, and you know what there are uh, some schools of thought going around Not about reynolds though, although that it's it's the same vein about mitch keller And, and, you know, as an example, Keller pitched eight innings, got his 10th win to lead the Pirates over the Mets to split the series. But he's not an all-star. And, and he's not an all, well, you know what? He is, he's like 53rd in strikeouts per nine. Um, he's like 56th in whip. He he's actually, if, if you look at the statistics, he's not in the top 10 in any statistics except wins. Yeah. And wins are not just a result of him pitching. I mean, your offense has to score enough run. I would say so. I don't think he's a star. It has a lot to do with.

Steve: Yeah, I think this may be the only time you hear me say say this. So you'll want to turn your your volume up for this. We don't have to turn our volume up for you. I actually feel a little bad for him, Keller. Yeah, I feel bad for Mitch Keller. And here's why. on any other team, he would be an all-star. But because the Pirates are who the Pirates are, he's not an all-star. If he was pitching for the Phillies right now, he would be an all-star. If he was even pitching for the Mets or the Yankees, absolutely would be an all-star. And I feel bad for the guy, honestly. He signed a good contract, he's living up to his billing as a pirate, and the team and the organization is once again letting him down.

Chris: So, my apologies to Mitch. I agree with you. I actually do. I agree with you. I think Mitch Keller is performing magnificently.

Marc: You still actually want to say that he's their number one pitcher, don't you? No, but yes. You're coming around.

Steve: That's a classic Klein answer. No, but yes.

Chris: It's the Libra in me. It's the Libra in me. I want to say he's their number one pitcher because of the year he's having based on the contract he signed. The body of work. The body of work. Good one. And the fact that, and this is an interesting thing I heard on the radio today. Okay. with Paul Skeen, so let's get right into this, with Paul Skeen's being named to the all-star team. And we can talk. Rightfully so. We can debate whether or not he'll start or he should start. I have a feeling that may be the Grants-Wabini's prediction, but I know we can debate that all you want. And I also understand that Major League Baseball is a revenue producing business and the all-star game is a revenue generating event. However, He has 10 games in the major leagues. 10 games. The best 10 for any rookie ever. That is true. Absolutely. That is true. There was a guy named Zach Duke who put together, like previous to this, one of the 10 best starts to a career. And where the hell is he now? How about Jose de Leon? Right. Right. I am not saying look for, for those of you who love Paul skeins, um, I am, I am not in the camp that loves Paul skeins. I am the K in the camp that says, yes, he's got the potential a hundred percent. He's showing it. Absolutely. But you gotta give the, the guy's got to pitch a full season and he's got to come back. I feel like he should. earn it more. Absolutely. I think Mitch Keller still has to prove himself. I think he does. I really do. I mean, look, he is obviously proven that his billing was everything. He's got nasty shit coming out of that arm. He's got a, you know, five or six different great pitches. Don't don't go down that road of nasty shit. I know where you're going. I can see it in his face. There was a comment coming, don't you think so?

Steve: No, I was not paying attention. I was just about to say, hey, Marvin, welcome.

Marc: Continue your rant about nothingness.

Chris: And yes, good evening, Marvin. Thanks for being here on Facebook. Yeah. The bottom line is this. I am of the camp that says, look, Paul Skeens needs to put together a body of work that you shouldn't hop over veteran major league players that are putting up that work and have done consistently. And if you remember Mitch Keller in his first couple of years, I don't want to say it was a disaster, but he wasn't that great. And he obviously worked really hard to get to where he is. And the Pirates are not an all-star team and they are not going to go anywhere this year. I hate to say that. They're not. They're not. Not this year. Mitch Keller deserved to be named to the all-star game. I don't think it's a good look to take a guy like Paul Skeens and throw him up there right away.

Steve: That's my take. Let me just tell you how wrong you are. Okay, please. Okay, first you're taking… About Paul Skeens. Yes. Let me tell you how wrong you are about Paul Skeens, okay? First, you have a very Mike Tomlin-esque viewpoint of the older guy should be in there before the younger guy, which is ridiculous. Second, he has the hottest girlfriend on the planet in Livy Dunn. So therefore, that definitely gets him into the all-star game, because it gets Livy into the all-star game, and it gets more people tuning into the all-star games. And third, he is a money-making machine. And the only thing about the Pirates that matters is, ka-ching, ka-ching, ka-ching, and he's bringing home the bacon, baby. And he's got a hot girlfriend, and that's all that matters about this team.

Marc: I think the Livy Dunn is his greatest achievement thus far.

Steve: So it's it's up there that in the mustache.

Chris: Yeah. Well, I mean, look, we're talking about, like, long term relationship potential here. I mean, what are the odds that five years from now, Libby Dunn and him are together?

Steve: Well, she's already been seen. She's already been seen with Joe Burrow. Okay. Yes. Zero.

Chris: Yeah.

Steve: Although, I think in the long run, I think he's going to make more bank than Joe Burrow.

Chris: You think so? It's a baseball contract.

Steve: It's a baseball contract. Yeah. And he's a pitcher.

Chris: I'm talking fundamentals. What do you think, Schwaber? About what? About all of this. All of this nothingness.

Marc: Well, I think that Mitch Keller should have been an all-star. I think Paul Skeen should have been an all-star, too. I think they both should have been all-stars. And I think that, yeah, there is something about, it's nice to reward somebody who's been in the game for a while and has really kind of earned his way and maybe come from nowhere, or at least nowhere special, like not a number one overall pick, and give them that moment. But I think the moment is there. for it to be, um, you know, I losing, I can't, what I'm saying is you need to have the moment and all its splendor. Um, well, you know, so you, you, you have to, you know, the fact is, is that people want to watch Paul skiing.

SPEAKER_01: Yeah.

Marc: They don't, they don't care about the pirates want to watch Mitch.

Chris: I listen, I, I am a hundred percent in agreement with what Steve has said and what you're alluding to, that people want to see this guy in the all-star game. I get the idea that they want viewership, they want sponsorships, the almighty dollar, all of that. I get that. Almighty dollar. But what I'm saying is there is something that is slowly being sucked out of professional sports, and in this case, we're talking about baseball, and it's called integrity. And yes, Paul Skeens has put together 10 starts in his Major League Rookie season that have been incredible. And the Pirates, he has not lost a start. And his ERA is in the low twos. He's second in the league in Ks per nine. It's not official yet because he hasn't pitched enough innings, but he would be. He is without question the talent that they said he was, but he has only started 10 games. And the all-star game is supposed to reward players that are all-stars at their position and have been for a little bit longer. Let me back up a second and say this. So this is an integrity issue. It's an integrity issue. Tell us more. I would agree. I would agree. I would be more apt to agree with this. With this selection of Paul Skeens in the all-star game. Had he been on the opening day roster and add another four starts and maybe he was 14 starts in or 16 starts in, but he wasn't even on the opening day roster.

Marc: So he didn't meet the Chris Klein criteria.

Chris: He did not meet the technical director criteria.

Marc: Including integrity. And because of that, integrity of the league is at stake.

Chris: I think the integrity of all professional sports is at stake right now, but that's a whole other show.

Steve: Oh my God, I could go off on that for 15 minutes.

Marc: What makes you the expert on integrity?

Steve: Well, nothing. Just think about what you're saying.

Chris: My lack of integrity for the first half of my life.

Steve: Just think about what you're saying, integrity in baseball. This is a sport that started with guys who were alcoholics playing. Ty Cobb was a known alcoholic, so was Babe Ruth. Pure alcoholics used to play dead drunk. And you have Doc Ellis in the 1970s who pitched on LSD. He pitched a no-hitter on LSD.

Marc: I didn't think I'd hear of Doc Ellis.

Steve: On top of that, let's talk about all the steroids that were never banned and then they got rid of all those players who were hitting all those home runs. That was scandalous. in the steroid era, right? And now there are billions and soon to be trillions of dollars of betting that's going on in Major League Baseball, and you want to say this game has integrity? This game has never had integrity. It may be the pastime of the United States of America, but Major League Baseball has never had integrity, and that is just a ridiculous thing to say. They are in the gutter.

Marc: They are. Major League Baseball should be ashamed of themselves. But they do have a good pitch clock.

Chris: Yeah, the pitch clock is worth it. The pitch clock is good. Okay, Marvin Hamilton says, facts. He agrees with you. Mike Lawrence says, did Skeen set some kind of record getting picked in such a short time playing? Yes. That has to be a record. Yeah, he's the first.

Marc: He is the first guy, the first number one pick to make the All-Star Game in his first season. That's right.

Chris: Yeah, that's right. But he was selected by he wasn't all right by the fan.

Steve: Right. Because in the past, you would have had to vote him in and he never would have been on the ballot to be able to get voted. That's right.

Chris: That's right. Integrity. So official Chris Chada on Instagram. Thanks for being here again, bud. He says. Your take has been right. The Pirates win 2, lose 2, win 1, lose 2, etc. They need to go on a 10-game winning streak, but will that happen? Probably not. Absolutely not.

Steve: No. They don't have enough consistency in their batting or their pitching, honestly, to be able to go on that kind of win streak. Even if they went to like 7-3, wouldn't you say, Mark, that would be good enough?

Marc: Well, I think the main issue is that Paul Skeens can't make multiple starts in a row.

Steve: Yeah, well, they only want to, they only want to pitch him every six times. So, you know, they want to, they want to keep it, keep it further out there.

Chris: For this three game set this weekend, we've named our starter Paul Skeens, Paul Skeens, and Paul Skeens.

Steve: It's like the Bugs Bunny.

Chris: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Left, left field Bugs Bunny, right field Bugs Bunny, center field Bugs Bunny. Remember that cartoon, Schwager?

Marc: I'm not a big cartoon.

Chris: Oh, that's a classic, man. It is. It is a classic.

Steve: Yeah. And you don't need to be on LSD to watch.

Marc: No, I just see you at home, like sitting with a bag of Cheetos, watching the stupid rabbit jump up and down.

Chris: First of all, first of all, it would be a bag of Fritos, not Cheetos. And second of all, there's nothing stupid about that rabbit Pringles for me. There you go. Okay. Yep. What is the catchphrase? What's up, Doc? What's up, Doc? That's pretty good. What's up, Doc? Yeah. All right.

Steve: We digress. I think we've had enough of this baseball.

Chris: Seriously.

Steve: I think it's starting to ruin our minds.

Chris: Well, here's the thing. Here's one. Here's one stat I heard today on the radio. Bob Pompiani brought this up, and I thought it was an extremely telling stat. I like Pompeo. there.

Steve: I do like, I like, yeah, I have, I have a thing about Pompeiani that maybe we'll talk about in the Steeler segment, but I digress.

Chris: So, um, he, he just threw this out there in a conversation. He said the pirates, uh, bullpen has blown 16 saves this year. Yeah, that's blown. So we all know what that means. That means they came into the eighth or the ninth inning in a safe situation. And they were leading and they blew it. Yeah. If they had blown 50% of those saves, they'd be in the water. If they, yeah, if they had blown 50%, right. Only eight of those only eight, they'd be in the wild card. Right.

Marc: So, you know, this is, this is, I disagree with that. The reason, the reason why that would not be true is because the only reason why they have these save opportunities is because they can't hit. So they're coming in two to one.

Chris: But at that point, it's on the pitcher. And I don't know how many of those were at home, where if they had pulled it out, it's the top of the inning.

Marc: You can't ask the pitchers to never give up runs.

Chris: No, of course not. But you come in with a lead. Your job is to shut the other team down and not give up a run and not blow the save. So had they gone on a 50% clip on those 16 blown saves, they'd be in the wild card. My point is not that they are our wildcard team. My point is that this is the quandary that we're in right now, which is, you can argue either side of this coin. You can argue that the Pirates are the Pirates and they're doing what they do and their lineup is horrible and they're just never gonna go anywhere and they're wasting these pitching opportunities if they don't get a bat for this year or next year, or they are so close. They are so close even with this lineup because of their pitchers.

Marc: It's hard to argue either one are a mad man. Well, so close.

Steve: Well, here's, here's the deal. If they were, if the Pittsburgh Pirates were a clutch team, then, then everybody would be much more excited about this team because they'd be winning those close games. That's right. And everybody'd be like, wow, this team's really got something going on, but they don't. And this goes back to, what I keep talking about since the beginning of the season. They don't have an identity yet. They don't have that player who's going to get that hit for them, who's going to take them from a 3-2 losing to a 4-3 winning. They just don't have it. I think Brian Reynolds is starting to show signs of being that guy, but he can't do it by himself. It's ridiculous to think that anybody in Major League Baseball can do it by themselves. But he's really trying, so I have to give him some credit. I'm really happy he did make the all-star team, and it would be an absolute travesty if they did decide to sell him at the highest price, because Mark is right. That is exactly what the Pittsburgh Pirates would do.

Chris: Yeah, they would. But see, this year, I don't think, if they're going to sell anybody right now, and it would be very, well, Here's where I come down on who are they going to sell. I said this in the beginning of the year, and I stick by it. Aroldis Chapman.

Marc: They signed him to the contract.

Steve: I don't know if anybody wants him. He's been pitching so poorly though.

Chris: But he's also come in in situations where it's a close game. You know what I mean? With that lineup, he doesn't have any support. Battle testing. Right. He is battle tested. They signed him in the beginning of the year. They paid him that 10 million bucks because they they didn't know what was going to happen with schemes. They had no idea that Jones was going to be as effective as he was. They had no idea. Now he's on the I.R. Right. That Bailey Fulter would have such a great beginning of the year. um and they had no idea that their bats would be as horrible as they are they signed him with the intent of being able to flip him at the trade deadline because he's a battle-tested commodity who has won the he's a great reliever and he still throws 140 he threw a pitch the other night that was 104 miles an hour really Yeah, I was listening on. I was listening to the fan. He came in and it was like 102-101-104. Three pitches in a row. I mean, the guy brings the heat. And you're telling me there's not a playoff contender that wouldn't want to add him to the bullpen? He is a trade chip. Nobody is really talking about it. Yeah. My prediction as if I was the Grand Schwabini, my prediction would be at the trade deadline, regardless of where the Pirates are, because unless they go on a 10-game win streak, they will be trading Eraldis Chapman for prospects. Absolutely.

Marc: So now shall we go to the Grand Schwabini?

SPEAKER_01: Let me answer Mike's question first.

Chris: Mike has a question on Facebook. How is the Buccos attendance this year?

Steve: I just looked it up. They're 25th in Major League Baseball. They have an average attendance at home of 21,455. And on the road, believe it or not, they're bringing in 28,455. That's not bad. So, it's not very good, actually. 25th out of what, 32? Yeah, I know, but I mean, for the Pirates, I think that's actually not… Well, let's face it, nobody goes to the Pirates game until summertime, and summertime's here, so we'll see if they can sell out those weekenders.

Chris: The Pirates always give away their best players, says Marvin Hanley. Marvin is so true. So before we get to the Schwab beanies prediction, I want to remind you that you can catch the sports sports podcast right after the show. If you want to catch up and listen on the I heart radio app, Apple podcasts, Spotify, or anywhere you get your frigging podcasts. And of course, uh, you can follow us on YouTube at the sports porch podcast. Now it is time for the grand Schwab beanie predicts late on a Scranton.

Marc: Well, beanie sees the future. And the future involves the Major League Baseball All-Star Game. I have been asked a question by the minions. The question is, will Paul Skeens get the nod as your National League Baseball All-Star starting pitcher?

Steve: Rub it.

Marc: I'm rubbing the lamp and it becomes very clear to me. that Paul Schemes will start the All-Star Game for the National League. The future has been seen.

Steve: I love it. I love it.

Chris: So you really think they're going to name him the starter? I do. You don't think that's going to ruffle some feathers? It might, but nah.

Steve: He's, he's a very popular pitcher.

Marc: I don't think anybody really cares.

Steve: No, let's face it. All the pitchers who really should be pitching probably are like, I don't want to pitch anyways. So don't even, I don't even want to be there. So let's, let's just let the phenom pitch.

Chris: Okay. So the Grand Swabini predicts that Paul Skeens will get the all-star starting nod.

Steve: That would be great. Who would he get to pitch against? Judge? Machado.

Marc: I think Shohei Ohtani is going to lead off.

Steve: Ohtani. How about that? He gets a pitch to those three guys.

Chris: He has struck out Ohtani and given up a homer. And given up a homer. So it's kind of a, you know, it's an all or nothing thing with him. Yeah. I mean, look, putting aside all of my thoughts on it and all that kind of stuff, I think it'd be pretty fun to watch him start the all-star game. I mean, it's not that he's not fun to watch. I mean, he's got great stuff.

Steve: Dude, let's face it. You know, none of us are watching the all-star game. I'm not going to.

Marc: I'll tell you what, I might. If Keane pitches, I will probably turn it on. I'll watch the first inning if he pitches. If he doesn't pitch first, I won't watch it at all.

Steve: Yeah, that's exactly the way I feel about it, Mark.

Chris: Yeah, because it's not worth it after that. Okay, we have some Steelers news here. um and i think i think um no it's bad news yeah it's regarding cam sutton what what did this derelict do yeah well why don't you take it away steve well we already know that he's had domestic abuse problems and um and it's clearly documented that's why detroit lions got rid of him

Steve: And when the Steelers picked them up, they knew about it. And today the NFL said, you will be not playing in the first eight games. And that's actually double what I thought would happen. And I think it's actually a good sign that the NFL is finally cracking down on this domestic abuse issue. I hope he's just not the only guy they go after, to be honest with you. So, I think it's good. And actually, for the Steelers, it probably works out better, because they got it rough on the back end. The first eight games aren't that terrible. So I think they could probably do without him in that slot, that nickel position, wherever they're going to play him. So he'll be out the first eight games.

Marc: I guess the question becomes, how do you feel about bringing in a guy where you know this is the case?

Steve: Look, they've had a lot of nefarious players that play for the Steelers doing nefarious things. All teams do. Right? So, I don't know. Personally, I think he's paying what he should get penalized for, and you just move on from there. Plus, let's face it, if he wasn't a Pittsburgh Steeler already, they wouldn't have brought him back. So they think that that was just a one time thing. They knew him from before this happened. And he's, you know, that I think all that kind of factors into the fact that they brought him back. Well, I mean, yeah. And they knew he was going to get a suspension. They just didn't know how much.

Marc: A positive way of looking at it could be that maybe they felt like it would help him to bring him back into the Steelers culture.

Steve: Well, yeah, I mean, and let's face it. They brought in Mike Vick, who could be worse than Mike Vick and what he did. Right. And, but I mean, he, he already served his time when they brought him back. But I mean, that guy did some despicable thing.

Chris: He did. He did do some despicable things. And Marvin chimes in on Facebook again and says, these nice, these guys need to make better decisions. I mean, thanks for telling us what we already know. Um, uh, Cam was a Steeler before and Tomlin protecting a, really a bill is, is, is, oh, that's a great name, man.

Steve: He, he, he's got the word of the day today. Rehabilitated the bowl.

Marc: Rehabilitatable. I'm not this guy's medical degree.

Chris: I like it.

Marc: I don't think that's a word. I think it's no, no, I like it. I think the flitch, that's a great word. He's got a medical degree. He thinks he can just start making up words. Like nobody's going to notice. Well, guess what? We caught you. Guess what? I love it.

Steve: It's not a word. It's a word.

Chris: Rehabilitatable. No. And he's also drinking. So,

Steve: Put it this way, he's had a rough weekend. He was out, you know, patching up fingers and hands from being blown off over the 4th of July. So if anybody should be drinking, it should be the doctor.

Marc: They say that in St. Patrick's Day is the worst time.

Chris: God loves Marines because we keep heaven packed full of souls.

Steve: Well, thanks for that full metal jacket.

Marc: It wasn't relatable.

Steve: Anyway, that's what's going on. Can I tell you my Bob Pompeiani story now? Sure. Okay, so you know that Bill Hillgrove is not coming back, right? Right, right. So it sounds like Bob Pompeiani is going to get the job. Right. So that's it. That's all there is. That's it. I thought the people would want to know who they're going to be listening to when they put on the Stillers this fall.

Chris: I think Bob's going to get the job.

Steve: Yeah. It's down to him and Rob King. Rob King? Yeah. Who the hell is Rob King? He does a lot of Penguin stuff. He's a really good play-by-play guy. But I think Pompey Annie will get it. He'll probably bring his daughter along, too, for the ride.

Chris: Celia, I think… They got canned from the pens. No, I think it should be Hockey Jesus, the Grand Schwabini, and the technical director. I think we should do the play.

Marc: Well, I'd love to do it.

Chris: Yeah. I think it would be well, we can go dimension.

Steve: We could go down to the hall of fame area and we can actually call a couple of plays. Yeah, we should do that. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04: He was running real fast, and he threw the ball down there, and he dove in the end zone, and then it got touched down, and I couldn't believe it. I said, joy! That's a double joy.

Steve: Did you like that one?

SPEAKER_01: Yeah.

Steve: We just did it.

Chris: We don't even need to go down there. We just did it live. I'm just glad I wasn't watching myself while he was doing that.

Steve: Yeah, you're just going to hurt when you play that one back.

Chris: All right. We're going to make this H.J. really quick here because they're real quick. There's some rumors going around. So first, if you're watching live. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. We got an official Chris Chada Instagram. Comment here. Do you find it as annoying as I do the huge cast of ex-pirates doing pirates broadcasts? It's a clown car of ex-players. Hey, listen official chris. Let me tell you it is I I like mike brown and joe block. I like those two guys there They call the play-by-play on the fan or on the pirates radio network. I think their voices are good And I think they're really good. However, I think you're a hundred percent correct that whoever they have On the other side, the color guy is they are some of the most boring baseball announcers I've ever heard in my life. All due respect to them as baseball players. I think it's Bob Wainer and Kevin Young.

Marc: Kevin Young played second base for them.

Chris: uh uh from yeah from yeah walker neil walker oh neil walker they were all good players and all respect to that but but as far as the uh clown car yeah clown car vex players so uh if you're watching us live all over the world on facebook linkedin youtube and x as well as instagram i appreciate it we appreciate it it's the sports sports podcast this is the black and gold edition we will be dropping it on the iheartradio app apple podcast spotify or anywhere. You get your frigging podcast right after the show. Please subscribe. Leave us a review here. CD says.

SPEAKER_04: bumbling, stumbling.

Chris: That's a great classic, Myron Cope. And you can follow us. Not that's Chris Berman. Thank you. Sorry about that. And you can always follow us at the Sports Sports Podcast on YouTube. Now we're going to bring in Hockey Jesus. Hockey Jesus preaches on the after every single Penguins regular season game. Come in. And during the Stanley Cup playoffs, the finals and the offseason, please subscribe to the sports sports podcast and you can catch the Hockey Jesus updates. Hockey Jesus preaching right now. And what Hockey Jesus has to say is ignore the Crosby rumors. Sid's not going anywhere.

Steve: Listen up, people who have a thing that thinks Sidney Crosby is going anywhere. If you see anything on the internet that says Sidney Crosby rumored to be leaving the Penguins, Sidney Crosby not happy with his current structure, Sidney Crosby doesn't want to play with the Penguins anymore because they're not doing the right things. It's all clickbait, people. Do not click on it. Do not give these losers one bit of your time. You have the hockey Jesus right here and I'm going to tell you exactly what you need to hear. Please do. Sidney Crosby will be signing with the Pittsburgh Penguins. It will either happen this week. I predict if I was the Grand Schwabini, I would predict that by this time we meet next week, he will be signed to a three or maybe a four-year contract. That'll put him in Pittsburgh for the next four to five years, which gets him to about 41, 42. He's going to be a penguin for life. And he already said that he hasn't decided if this is his last contract. And here's the deal. With Sidney Crosby, he wants to play at the highest level. If he can't be a first-line center, he's going to retire. And when that happens, you will absolutely know. The other small thing you need to know about his contract is, it'll be an over-35 contract, which means they can't do this, give him a signing bonus, make it nice so that people can pick him up at the end of the year. You can't do any of that with players that are over 35. You have to pay him the full contract, no matter what it is, at any year. If he did want to go, somebody would have to eat his whole contract. My guess is, it's probably going to be in the range of between $10 million and $11 million. I think that's probably what it'll be for three to four years. Stop clicking on that clickbait. It's garbage. I hate it every time I see it. I get a lot of feeds on hockey, on my searches, and I never click on them. I just laugh at them.

Chris: And you should do the same. That's bullshit. He clicks on him all the time. He sends his text saying, yeah, I fell for this one.

Steve: No, no, I screenshot it to you guys. And I say, look at this moron. Right. Don't click on it. Well, you could click on a picture, but as a technical director, I think you know what that will get you. Yeah. Nothing. I get it.

Chris: I get it.

Steve: OK, so. So that's it. That's really all there is with the Penguins news. There's you know, there was there's this development camp going on now where all the new players are coming in. You're not going to learn anything from that. It's just a reason to get everybody in the room and say, welcome to Pittsburgh. And here are all the players and have fun.

Chris: Here's a puck, go play.

Steve: Yeah. I think they know how to do it. By the way, I did see a story, and this will be it after this. I did see a story where Sydney Crosby actually did go to developmental camp for the LA Kings before he got picked. There's actually a picture with him with a LA Kings developmental jersey. It's not their real jersey, but it's got that crown and it's kind of purple. It was pretty weird to see. I don't know if it was Rob Rossi on The Athletic who did that, but it was pretty weird to see that he actually did it. He was talking about who the great players were. And, um, everybody said that he was like, at that point, then he was only 16 at the time. He was like better than almost everybody on the ice.

Chris: It's interesting. There was something on the radio today. They were saying, uh, they think that Paul Skeens and this does have to do with hockey. They think that right now, Paul Skeens is the greatest rookie Pittsburgh sports figure. It ever that's what they're trying to say or paul's ice was saying this and they're comparing him to big ben Sidney Crosby and paul skeens for my money Sidney Crosby was the best rookie.

Steve: He scored 101 points as a rookie He scored 102 points, but the problem is it 100 and 106 points that year was scored by ovechkin and he ended up winning the rookie of the year

Chris: Yeah, but what I'm saying is he's the best rookie of all time. Pittsburgh player. I don't agree with that. I don't agree with it either.

Marc: I think it's Sidney Crosby. Well, who even knows? I mean, how did Barry Bonds do his first year? Not that great.

Steve: No, he wasn't. He wasn't great. And Big Ben. I don't know, dude. Mario Lemieux was pretty impressive when he came in.

Chris: I don't know. I don't know.

Steve: They were only talking about the score on his first shift, on his first shot. Yeah.

Chris: I mean, yeah. Yeah. At that point he was scoring at a hundred percent clip. Um, okay. So I just wanted to throw that out there. Uh, this is the sports porch podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcast, Spotify, or anywhere you get your frigging podcast. It is now time for stump the Yinzer. Oh man. The Yinzer. All right. Are you ready? Sure. Here's what stump the Yinzer is. Hockey Jesus is our resident Yinzer, born and bred in Western PA. It doesn't get any more Yinzer than him, other than maybe his brother, Doug, or his brother, CD. They're Yinzers. Yep. But I think you're the biggest one.

Steve: Well, yeah, because I've stayed in Pittsburgh the longest, so screw those guys.

Chris: Yeah, they're fake. Sorry, brother. So what we do is we ask a Pittsburgh sports question of the Yinzer. He gets a chance to answer. If he answers, he retains his title, which was bestowed upon him by blood. If he doesn't get the answer, our resident Grant Schwabini gets a chance to answer and become the Yinzer for the week. We got that down now. I'm ready. Here is the question. Stump the answer. Mario Lemieux once said about this famous Pittsburgh broadcaster. One time I was on his radio show. I didn't understand a word. I just answered the questions. Yes. No, I think so. Who was the broadcaster?

Steve: I'm going to go, and I don't know this one, but I'm going to go with Myron Cope.

Marc: I'm going to go with, um, who was the Penguins announcer that would say, scratch me in the back with an actual. Mike Lang. Mike Lang. I'm going to go Mike Lang.

Chris: Okay. The answer is Myron Cope.

Steve: Oh, I retain my Yinzer status. There you go. I don't know why Myron Cope would be interviewing Lemieux other than to get all the Steelers fans that will start watching some hockey. Yeah. And back in the early 80s, that was definitely needed.

Chris: Okay, guys, this is one of our favorite parts of the show because I think everybody right now might be a little bit hungry.

SPEAKER_04: Taste the biscuit.

Marc: Taste the goodness of the biscuit.

SPEAKER_04: Taste the honey sauce.

Marc: the goodness of the biscuit with the honey sauce.

SPEAKER_01: Don't get that honey sauce on me.

Marc: I don't like the way it tastes with my chicken wings.

Chris: So this is the Trader Joe's snack time segment. Everybody knows I work at Trader Joe's. Great place to work. Great store. One of the best grocery stores ever, to be honest with you, and a great place to work. They do not pay us for this. They're not an official sponsor, but they did give me permission to do this. So we're going to have a good time. What we do, is every week I bring a product or two home from Trader Joe's and I let the guys taste it. We give our honest opinion on it. This week it's a it's a double shot product and a little creation of my own. It is a snack and the first part of the snack is something called everything but the bagel seasoned kettle cooked chips. Oh, chips. So we all know what an everything bagel. Yeah, right. Yeah. All right. So these are potato chips that have the everything bagel seasoning on them. And what I did is I created a dip. So it's not just dry. I created a dip with Trader Joe's sour cream. Nothing special about that other than it's good sour cream and our crunchy chili onion sauce, which is super good. Is it super good?

Marc: Is it hot or no?

Chris: it is it is hot it's hot on its own is it hot or is it spicy so here we have the crunchy chili onion sauce okay which can actually be used as you can rub it on steaks seafood stuff like that and then right here we have the everything but the bagel chips and what i'm going to do is i'm going to open them up This stuff right here, man, dude, it is hot. Look, look how oily it is. I made, yeah, well it's, it's garlic, olive oil, chili onions. And yeah, but let me tell you, we're not going to use that as the dip. If you use that as the dip, I'll have to get a fire hose and put the fire.

Marc: You already put some in the sour.

Chris: Yes. I already put some in the sour cream. I just wanted to bring the jar down. So, so we can do that. I had to give it a little whiff. This stuff is a five alarm fire. Now I did have a guy come in the store and buy like eight of these and that's how I found out about it. Cause I'm like, Oh wow, you got a little crunchy chili onion thing going on. And he was like, yeah man, I put this on everything. I use it just as a dip by itself. I can't stop eating it. So I took it home and I made the mistake of putting one of our little corn chip dippers into it and eating it and like ran out of the house with my mouth on fire.

Steve: How did it feel the next day? Not good.

Marc: Bad. Did you run out of the house screaming? Yes.

Chris: Screaming. Dogs are chasing you down the driveway. And here's the homemade dip where I just put a little bit of sour cream and the crunchy chili onion sauce in there. Um, and it would probably help if I let everybody know exactly what we're doing here. So trader Joe's product of the week snack time. It's a double shot. Everything but the bagel chips with a sour cream and crunchy chili onion sauce dip. You guys dig in and let me know. I'm going to get a few chippies. Yeah, go for it.

Steve: There you go. Thank you. Snack time, baby.

Chris: Snack time. These chips are addictive. I will tell you that.

Steve: I love everything about the bagel. Yeah. Yep. Okay, going in. You're right, that dip is a little spicy.

Marc: Very good though.

Steve: It's good though. Oh my God, those chips, I could eat that whole bag. There you go. Yeah, those chips are perfect. They are. It's a winner. Yeah, go get them now. Go get them now, people. This is the best snack we've had on the show. Wow.

Chris: That's high praise. Those are excellent. Yeah. They're good with the dip too. Do you think I got the crunchy chili onion and the sour cream ratio right? Or should I add a little more sour cream?

Steve: I think it needs more crunchy chili onion, to be honest with you. Really?

Marc: A little hotter? I think you did it pretty well.

Steve: I think you could go a little hotter. Mm-hmm. All right. That is top notch right there. Very good. Excellent snack time.

Chris: Alrighty guys. I'm glad it's hot anyway. I'm glad you approved. There is our trader Joe's snack time. Yes, indeed. Let's take her on out. Oh yeah. We do this so we can eat more.

SPEAKER_04: Go on, Schwabber.

Chris: Okay. Love that snack time. Thank you. Trader Joe's for that. Um, and you guys have fun with that. Um, okay. Next segment on the sports porch, black and gold podcast, what we are watching. So, um, lots of streaming services out there. We like to stream things. Everybody likes to stream things. Please keep your streaming jokes to a minimum. Stream at your own will. At your own risk. This can go in so many different directions. Stream in your own… Backyard. There you go. Please stream in your own backyard. We select a few things that we're watching and we talk about them. The qualification is that you have to have completed the movie or documentary, or if it's a multiple season show, you at least have to have completed the season that you are watching in order to do it. So we're going to start with H.J. Well, mine's not a streaming service this week. It's a movie. It can be a movie, right? Yeah. Sure. Yeah. Yeah. H. H. J. has gone to see I still have to come on. I still can do it. Mike Lawrence's stream bourbon and coke.

Steve: That's all. Yeah.

Chris: Mike, you're you're you're speaking my language now. This this I'm I'm curious. I just leave the coke. Hj is streaming inside out to the movie. The movie. Come on.

Steve: Did you go with the boy scouts? You rented a cartoon? It was not. It's in the movies. You went to the movies? I went to the movies to see a kid's movie. Why? All I can tell you is have you seen inside out the movie? Yes. I saw the first one with my kids. Okay. So, so Mark is kind of disqualified from any bad mouthing of this movie because he didn't see the first one. Good luck with that. Right. Which makes sense because it is a kid film and you don't have children. So that makes sense. But Madison would love this movie. You should take her to go see this movie the next time you're together. I I she's probably already seen She probably has because it has grossed 1.22 billion worldwide since its release in in in june Probably not if it's not taylor swift or golf.

Marc: She's out.

Steve: Well, I can tell you here's here's why I went to see it because it actually has like Very adult themes to it Because it's about a girl going through puberty and their parents reaction and their parents' reaction to that inside of their head, okay?

Marc: And also there is… You went to see a kid's movie in the movie theater about a girl going through puberty.

SPEAKER_01: No. It's a cartoon. No, I did not. I went to see Inside Out

Steve: A movie that has grossed 1.22 billion dollars worldwide. Now I understand why. That has characters that are in, you know, essentially they imitate the way your thinking process is with these characters in your brain. Right. So they have anger, all the normal ones, happiness, sadness. Right. That was in the first movie that you didn't see, Mark. And in this new one, there's there's new characters like anxiety and embarrassment. And they basically they basically go through typical teenager scenes of, you know, being embarrassed and trying in Riley's case, trying to make the hockey team. Right. So she's she's in a hockey team with other girls. She's going to high school soon, so what kind of things are going through her mind when she's trying to make the hockey team, and make friends, and go to a new school, and keep her old friends? And this all revolves around purity. It all revolves around the characters in her head, which are animations, and very well done. By the way, they actually did use neurologists to kind of back up the way you're thinking, and the way your thinking process works in your brain. with like long-term memory and short-term memory and how you kind of get rid of some things and keep some things. They just did it in a very visual way. I still want to explore this puberty, Hank. I think we should save that for another show and move on.

Chris: How about you, Mark, former psychologist? Can we explain a young woman's puberty in a two-hour Disney Pixar movie? One hour, 45 minutes.

Steve: Pass. I'd say smart. All right. It's it's an excellent movie. If you have children, I absolutely suggest to go see it. But honestly, it's not really it's not really a theme movie for like five or six year olds, like five or six year olds like might think the characters are funny, but they won't get the story. Right.

Chris: Right. You know what I mean? What you're saying is it's actually a movie about girls puberty for middle aged men.

Steve: Did you did you did you watch The Incredibles?

Marc: Of course I did. Is that Toy Story? No.

Chris: He doesn't have any kids. He's like completely out of the animation world. I saw Incredibles and Incredibles 2.

Steve: All those all those all those animation stories have a storyline that are there for adults. Yeah. Well, it's not just it's not just for the kids. The humor is kind of on a kid level, but on another level, there's more humor that you only you're going to get.

Chris: Yeah.

Steve: And that's what I think is great about these animation movies. I still have not, especially ones that, you know, make over a billion dollars.

Chris: Well, I mean, the money is great, but I still have tried to, I'm still trying to rectify in my head the whole, like, um, none of these other movies were referencing uh were described as a you know it's a a puberty thing i think there's an issue here i really do that one what you're you haven't gone through puberty yet and you don't know how to react that's a totally i think that's the issue we need to go down now that's a totally separate issue because i am not a young woman and so i there de facto will go through young woman's you're not you're not a young woman yet no This is true, but I made the choice to remain a man and I am just saying that I Did don't you think it's weird? You know, that's kind of weird.

Marc: I think my reaction kind of spoke to that. Yeah, okay. I

Chris: All right. H.J. went to see Inside Out 2, the movie.

Steve: By the way, I went with my wife. I didn't go alone.

Chris: That probably made it even more.

Steve: That helped. And we had the good seats. You know, the seats where you have your own space. You're not near anybody else.

Chris: You didn't sit near any children.

Marc: I'd say in the future, lead with that.

Chris: Yeah.

Steve: No, I liked your response much better the way I did it.

Chris: All right. The Grand Schwab Beanie is watching Bratz.

Steve: Oh, yeah. I want to watch on Hulu, but it's on Hulu, so I can't. Yes. Yeah.

Marc: So, you know. I decided to, you know, go into the realm of you folks who watch a lot of 80s documentaries, 80s documents. And I basically proved to myself why I don't watch documentaries. You had to figure it out because I already knew the story. You know, I mean, you know, we all know, you know, the Brat Pack, you know, a bunch of young actors, uh, in their early twenties get famous for, you know, these, uh, Molly Ringwald coming of age type movies. Yeah. This is, you know, Rob club saying almost fire to me more and more, you know, kind of wonderful, pretty in pink, you know, Judd Nelson, Anthony Michael Hall, that whole crew. Yeah. So, um, you know, I thought it was stupid. Um, honest opinion. Yeah. I mean, here's, here's kind of what it comes down to. Right. You know, no, look, I sort of get it. You know, what happened was, is some writer, you know, basically wrote a piece on them that was kind of gleared geared towards clickbait, which we call now. Right. And it was to get a reaction. And so we called them the brat pack. And it was to kind of suggest that, you know, maybe these are just like, these are actors that aren't really taking things seriously. They just kind of lucked into these roles, you know, and they're not all that anyway, right? Yeah. And so it dramatically changed the lives of some of these actors. Now, while I do think that is true in some respects, okay, I also think that the people that it negatively affected just weren't that great. Right. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, like, so think about it like this way. Yeah. It didn't negatively affect me more. No, no, it did not. It didn't negatively affect Rob Lowe. Right.

Chris: True.

Marc: Both of them were really hot. Right. Yeah. It didn't negatively.

Steve: And talented. Yeah.

Marc: Well, it didn't negatively affect them. Right now. Yeah. Andrew McCarthy, not really an A-lister.

Chris: Yeah. But he's still, he's still working. Yeah. He still has a career. He's made, he's made money like an A-lister. Yeah.

Marc: But, you know, I mean, like, you know, look, there is Emilio Estevez to me, just not special.

Chris: Yeah. Well, he went on to do Mighty Ducks.

Steve: Yeah, he did. He he made his money in Hollywood.

Marc: It's kind of while he was from a Hollywood family. But it's kind of yeah. But it's kind of like we're making a documentary about how hard it was to be called a bunch of brats.

Steve: All right. I get that. Yeah, I can understand that.

Marc: And it was just kind of ridiculous, you know. If it happened to me and I felt that I didn't get big roles because people put me in a box, the Brat Pack box, then I guess that it would have irritated me to the point where maybe I'd make a documentary about it.

Steve: But yeah, right. Yeah.

Marc: 40 years later. But like to hear you complain about it.

Chris: Well, that's a different, see, that's the thing you, when you say like, this is why you don't watch documentaries. I watch documentaries about things that are, that are interesting. Like I would probably, I will probably watch this documentary. Right. Okay. Now I might not like it just like you.

Marc: The only reason why I watch it was because I liked those movies. Right. Yeah. Like, I liked that time period. Right. You know? Um, but you know, to me it, you know, and, and here's the thing too, it also may not have just may not have been that good of a documentary.

Steve: Right.

Marc: It's positive because sometimes what you say is you like it when they give you, um, you know, tidbits that you didn't know. That's exactly right. And I didn't really, I didn't really feel like there was a heck of a lot that I didn't know.

Chris: Yeah, that's exactly right. So that makes it a, that makes it a bad documentary.

Marc: It was, it was almost just like, Okay. Uh, yeah. They wrote that article and people didn't give you roles and you felt bad. Well, I already knew that. Is there any, is there anything more to it? Not really. Right. Amy said it was a bit boring. And then she also said it wasn't a real world problem, but some of them acted like it was. Right. Yeah.

Steve: I can see where that, I can see where that makes sense.

Chris: Well, and as a, as a quick followup to that, I watch a documentary on Duran Duran. Oh yeah, you said you hated it. It was awful. Yeah. It was awful. It was basically like, you know, we formed a band. We wrote a bunch of songs. We partied a lot and got a lot of women and made a lot of money. We didn't really expect to. Then we wrote a bunch more songs and we're still writing songs. that was right documentary right right and i was disappointed nothing added yeah because there wasn't really any well and i guess to their credit as a band they didn't really have any real controversy right nobody like

Marc: wigged out on drugs.

Chris: Yeah. I mean, they did drugs. They, they, they had a good time, but they, they didn't misbehave like the Rolling Stones did. So, you know, there wasn't a lot of drama. Okay. Grant Schwabini did not like Bratz on Hulu. You be the judge, watch it for yourself. Now I am going to get absolutely, uh, watch the four part Bon Jovi documentary. Okay. Thanks Amy. I thought that was good. I haven't watched that one. I'm going to get lambasted for this, but here, here's the thing. I do not have a whole lot of time to watch documentaries, to watch a whole lot of shows. And, uh, I did finish Nazis. I did. No, I did. No, you guys are going to crush me for this. Just Nazis. There goes the algorithm Hitler. So, um, no, no, no, no, but I did finish the one that I, I reviewed last week. I finished season two of your honor. Uh, and it's worth every second. Watch it. It's only two seasons. It's worth every second. I was telling him earlier, but I am now rewatching the walking dead. Right. And what season are you on? I am. I have just finished, uh, season four. And the interesting thing about re-watching The Walking Dead for me. Is that pre Negan? Yes. It's like, yeah, it's right. It's right before Negan season five. I think Negan is season five. I stopped watching The Walking Dead in like season six and a half ish. I watched the whole season with Negan season five, but it was awesome. Season six. I stopped watching when Rick died, supposedly. Right. Okay. Oh yeah. When was that? Season three, right? No, no, no. Like season seven. Oh, really? Yeah. He made it all the way through Negan. Rick Grimes. Rick Grimes. Yeah. The lead character. Yeah, I know. He made it that far. Yeah. What happened for me is it, uh, and I won't go into the details of why.

Steve: I was thinking about his buddy. He didn't make it through season two.

Chris: Yeah, that was Shane. He killed Shane in season one. So, uh, for me, what was, uh, it kind of jumped the shark for me in season like seven and a half.

Steve: And, and I was just kind of like, I think what was happening. In the prison, that's where it kind of started going wonky for me.

Chris: Well, I think what, what happened was I just started getting, um, tired, fatigued, fatigued. Yeah. So I had to put it away. And, and at the same time I was watching fear the walking dead. So I was like, just inundated with this stuff. Yeah. I have committed myself now that the entire series is pretty much over to going from day one, watching all of them. So I will say that I am enjoying this because I forgot a lot. I am enjoying this more than I've ever enjoyed it before because I kind of remember some of the stuff that's coming. right. It's, it's, it's even, it's even better. And I'm also picking up on some of the little things and the foreshadowings that I missed. So I would encourage you if you were a big walking dead fan, it's a great show.

Steve: Go back and watch it again. Remember when I started to watch it, I watched, I started when they were like on season seven or eight already. And I'm like, I'm just going to pick it up because I hear it's only got like three more seasons left and everybody watches it. And I really enjoyed it because I didn't, I wasn't in the hype, but I was in the hype towards the end. And I'm just going to leave it up to you to decide how you like it.

Chris: Well, I got a long way to go. I can't, I can't blow through eight episodes in a day. Like I used to, I, I'm lucky if I get to. And so, you know, it's, it's, uh, like tonight I, I would normally, if we weren't doing the show, Tonight I'd be in there binge watching because it's nice because they're all about 43 minutes long.

Steve: Yeah, you can watch two, maybe three.

Chris: Yeah, I can get two, two and a half in. But anyway, Walking Dead. So, hey, anything left? Great show tonight, fellas.

Steve: Nothing left. I got nothing left in the tank. You took it all away from me. We laid it all on the line.

Chris: There you go. Finish the bagel chips. No brainer. Yeah, I know. No. All right. Thank you for watching the sports porch. If you're watching us live, this is the black and gold edition in Pittsburgh, all over the world on Facebook, LinkedIn, YouTube, X, and Instagram. And of course, you can always re-listen to the show live on Radio PGH every morning at 8 a.m. and every evening at 11 p.m. So if you like, get on over to Radio PGH, grab that screen and listen to it in your earbuds. And you can catch us on YouTube at the Sports Sports Podcast. For my illustrious co-hosts, Lance Schwabini and Hathi Hozi, I am your technical director, and I am out.

SPEAKER_04: Jablonsk.

Chris: Jablonsk. Hello.